


find an island in the flood

by lovecamedown



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Force Sensitive Finn, Mentions of Kylo Ren, Rey Skywalker, Sequel Trilogy AU, jedi academy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-19
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-01-16 10:17:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18519412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovecamedown/pseuds/lovecamedown
Summary: Finn and Rey were living two separate, lonely lives until one fateful day brought them together on the sandy planet of Jakku. Throw in a legendary Jedi looking for a mysterious new Force user, a bit of romantic tension, and kindred spirits destined to meet, and Rey and Finn are in for a journey.





	1. not a part of your machine

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so excited to be back with another multi-chapter finnrey! I really hope you like it <3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from "machine" by imagine dragons <3

It’s horrible here.

It’s sandy. So hot Finn can taste sweat on his lips, passing through on to his dry tongue; the sun is so bright it blinds him as he walks aimlessly through the seemingly never-ending, barren desert. He’s alone, he’s parched, and he’s scared. 

Still, it’s better than the alternative. Better than the life he’s running away from on this crazy planet. 

He doesn’t necessarily have a plan, per-se. All he knows is that he has to get away from the First Order. Twenty-two years old, and he doesn’t remember life before them. He just knows he was kidnapped as a young child; never to see his family or return to his life ever again. To be turned in to a machine, a soldier, a _killer_. 

Finn has been through a lot during his time with the Order. Seen things he wish he could forget. Seen people in pain that he wishes he could have helped.

But when they sent him here to Jakku, and asked him to kill, for real, for no reason—that was the last of it. 

He knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that he had to run. 

He wasn’t a part of their machine. He never has been. Even as the greatest, most skilled soldier in his division, he never fit in; never felt accepted, like he belonged, or like any of this is where his heart lies. 

Not that Finn knows where his heart _does_ lie; but he knows that it’s not with the First Order. 

So, he’s running. 

Or he _was_ running. Now, he’s merely struggling through the desert, barely staying on his feet, desperate for water and just a little bit of hope. 

There’s a small collection of buildings up ahead, and the possibility of finding water is all that’s keeping him going. He has to survive. Can’t let the First Order win. _Won’t_ let them find his body out here; give them the satisfaction of that. 

 

After drinking from a grumpy happabore’s water trough—which was disgusting, by the way, but water’s water—and then getting pushed away from it by said grumpy happabore, Finn’s mouth is no longer as fuzzy and dry. His vision swims less as he takes a minute to breathe, to try and formulate some kind of plan. 

There’s a small area of shelter that seems unoccupied. Given the nature of the people on this planet, a quiet space seems valuable and, well, vital for his survival. 

So, he sits in the tiny bit of shade, knees up at his chest. There are tears forming at the backs of his eyes. How the hell is he going to get out of here? How is he ever going to really, truly escape the First Order? 

He thinks of water again. It’s a symptom of dehydration. Just constantly thinking of water. 

This is really, truly, a shit day. 

He hears the slosh of the happabore’s water trough as if something has just landed in it, but when he looks up, the creature is no longer there. 

Frowning, Finn brings up a hand to shield his eyes from the bright sunlight to get a better look; and as he does so, all of a sudden, the water rises in a wave from the trough, like the oceans he’s seen in fight simulations. It rises, breaks, and falls once more, partially in to the container and partially in to the sand, immediately absorbed. 

The strange occurrence draws the attention of some surrounding scavengers, confirming that it’s not all just a mirage. Finn’s curiosity gets the better of him, and he stands up to go and see what on earth caused the wave. A creature, maybe? Could it be a natural spring? 

There are a few others gathered around the area, peering with peaked curiosity. As Finn approaches it, he doesn’t see anything inside the water, or a way that new water could enter the trough. One of the people roughly, and unnecessarily, pushes him out of the way to get a better view.

Shaking it off, he turns his attention back to the water and, carefully, reaches out his hand towards it; and most strangely, the wave happens again. It’s stronger, this time. Much bigger. It completely soaks the creature who pushed him out of the way, as if the water were aiming for them, as if it knew they’d just been rude to Finn. 

For an absurd, surreal moment, Finn looks down at his hand. He wonders…could it be…? His hand…his thoughts…maybe…?

He reaches out again and, sure enough, the water is moved; this time, in a much calmer ripple through the water, creating a small portion of it that rises in a tiny wave, gently coming towards him before slightly lapping over his shoes as he pulls his hand back. He does it again a few times, mesmerised. 

“You!” One of the creatures shouts, making Finn jump. “You did that to me! How? What are you, a wizard? Speak up, boy!” It yells, voice rough and face furious, pointing a wrinkled, accusatory finger in Finn’s direction. They’re dripping wet with happabore water. Finn has to bite his lip to stop from smiling. He hates to admit it, but it’s a rather funny sight. 

“I…,” Finn starts, looking down at his hand. “I don’t know what happened. I’m sorry.” 

“Sorcerer!” 

“No, I’m not—”

“Sorcerer! Sorcerer!” 

The being is yelling now, waving its arms to get people’s attention. 

“Shit,” Finn mumbles under his breath, quickly turning away and heading back for his small place of shelter, head down to avoid undue attention. 

The person follows him for only a few feet before giving in to the attention of the crowd they’ve drawn, enjoying the commotion surrounding themselves. 

Finn sits on the sand again and takes a deep breath. He looks down at his hands, turning them slowly as if something would look different if it _were_ truly him that caused the water to move. Surely it must be coincidence; surely, this could not be possible. 

 

Finn may have grown up in the First Order, but he has not been sheltered. 

He knows about the Jedi; about the Force. He’s always been told—conditioned, really—to believe that the Jedi were evil, that the Force must only be used to fulfil the will of the Order. 

And, well, Finn always liked to form his own opinions about things. He kept them to himself, mind you. Could never risk thinking things like, _maybe the people the Order hates aren’t that bad,_ being heard, and him being accused of treason. (The First Order are fucking touchy. They’re insecure, Finn thinks. Constantly fragile in their own stability.) 

But, as much as he’s always wondered about the legitimacy of the terrifying stories he’s heard about the Force, he could never possibly posses it; let alone harness it. He’s never even tried. Never even considered it. 

Finn doesn’t have a moment to think about any of this, because he catches sight of some people walking towards the little village; clearly not locals, much like himself. There are only three of them, but they come from a ship behind them that Finn assumes has more people aboard. 

They are wearing dark, hooded cloaks. The contrast between their clothing and the pale sand surrounding them is striking. Everyone else has noticed them, too, but the people don’t appear to be bothered that they are drawing attention. 

The mysterious figure walking ahead of the other two seems to say something, and then the two behind stop walking, standing at attention, while the main one continues on towards the main tent. 

The back entrance happens to be just next to where Finn is taking shelter. He hears as the person approaches, and the guards tell them that they cannot enter.

Finn can just tell, somehow, that they aren’t bothered by this. 

A voice—deep, probably male—calmly says, “you will let me through.” And it’s as if he knows they actually will. 

The same voice that, just ten seconds ago, said he could not pass, suddenly says, “I will let you through.” 

And the man’s footsteps disappear inside the tent. 

Finn is fascinated. Did they just change their mind because this man _told_ them to? How does that even _work_? 

In the back of his mind there’s a faint, vague memory of hearing about people who could do “mind tricks”, and get people to do what they wish. 

It only works on the weak minded, Finn remembers. 

And then, another part of the memory—it’s using the Force. 

His body takes control, all of a sudden, and he’s standing up, rounding the corner to the tent. He stops when he sees the guards. Waits.

It’s only a minute until the hooded man returns again. As soon as he does, he looks up sharply, as if Finn has said something to get his attention, his eyes wide underneath that mysterious hood. Finn has made no noise. Yet the man knew he was here. 

The man lifts up his hands. One revealed, one gloved. He slowly removes his hood. The look on his face is hard to read, but Finn thinks it’s shocked; surprised. Maybe even intrigued. 

_By me?_

Something about him is familiar, but Finn can’t quite place what it is. 

“Hello,” the man says to Finn, looking him right in the eyes, imploring. 

“Um—” Finn’s voice croaks. He clears his throat before speaking again. “Hi.” 

“What’s your name?” 

“Um—Finn.” (He’s been calling himself that for a couple of years now. He’s never wanted to just be a number. Giving himself a name gave him a certain level of control over his own existence, even though he was the only one who knew it). 

“I’m sorry to stare, Finn,” he says, stepping forward a little, past the guards. His voice is gentle, expression curious. Strangely, Finn can feel that this man is trustworthy in some way; can feel the kind of person he is. It’s a strange sensation, one that he tries to shake off. (To no avail.)

“I’m Luke,” he holds out his non-gloved hand for Finn to shake. “It’s nice to meet you.” 

“You—you too,” Finn shakes his hand tentatively, having never really greeted someone this way before. Luke’s grip is firm, reassuring. 

“Please forgive me for staring so rudely. It’s just—I sense something, Finn. Will you walk with me, for just a moment?” 

And he has nothing better to do. “Sure.” 

They walk away from the guards and the curious ears of the villagers. Not too far that it’s freaking Finn out, though. Thankfully. 

“I know this is going to sound strange. I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m a Jedi master. Goodness, that sounds so formal, doesn’t it?” He laughs. It’s genuine. Finn has never really heard another person laugh genuinely and without malice. People used to laugh at him in the barracks, but this isn’t the same. 

_Luke Skywalker?_

“Anyway, I feel that you may be strong with the Force. I’m very—good at sensing these things.” 

“Um…okay?” Finn thinks of the water trough. What the fuck is happening? 

Luke stops walking and reaches out, placing a gentle, gloved hand on Finn’s arm. It’s boney, as if he has no skin or muscle. And cold. Like metal. 

The pieces are starting to fit in to place.

He really is Luke-fucking-Skywalker, isn't he?

And his mouth begins to speak before his brain gives it permission. “I, um…earlier, I…I was near the water and I—when I reached towards it, it moved. And I mean _really_ moved. Do you know what that was?”

Luke’s lips turn up in to a slight smile. He looks satisfied. “Yes. I know this is going to sound crazy, Finn, but I think you are harnessing the Force. I sense it in you.” 

Finn gapes. “I, uh—?”

Luke stares at him for a short moment, as though looking for something behind his eyes. His face softens before he says, “I get the feeling you’re not from around here,” 

Finn swallows. His mouth is dry again. “Uh, no, I’m not.” 

“Where are you from, Finn?” The question is kind. 

But how does he tell someone he’s from the First Order without them immediately thinking he’s a bad guy? How does he tell _Luke Skywalker_ who he really is?

The truth has never helped him in the past. He’s had to keep all kinds of secrets from his superiors, from his squad members, to survive. 

But right now, here in the middle of the desert, with no idea where to go or who to be, he has nothing but the truth to tell. 

“I’m—I was a First Order stormtrooper. I—but I didn’t want to be. I was kidnapped as a young child and brought up to be a soldier. But I…I escaped. Literally just today, I escaped during my first kill mission. I couldn’t…I couldn’t do it.” 

Luke’s eyes are so kind, so warm. Finn has never been looked at with such compassion, never felt such care coming from someone before. It surrounds and wraps around him—comfort, reassurance—and the feeling is a lot to take in. 

The Force, huh?

“Well, Finn, I think you are very noble. And extremely brave.” 

“I…,” he doesn’t know what to say. 

“Tell me, Finn, would you come with me? I came to this planet in search of someone in particular, but I’m sure my students won’t mind if I pick up someone else.” 

“Your students?” 

Luke’s face darkens, just for a split second. The feeling of comfort retreats as if Luke has pulled it back. He looks down. “Yes. I—I am accompanied by the students from my Jedi academy. We are making the journey to a new place after…something happened at the last temple that meant we had to leave.” 

Finn frowns. He can tell Luke isn’t ready to go in to it right now; can tell that whatever happened, it’s still pretty fresh. Finn understands that, maybe more than anyone. 

“I’m sorry.” Finn says, tentatively squeezing Luke’s shoulder in reassurance. “I hope everyone is okay?” 

Luke smiles sadly. “Most of us,” he says, voice shaking a little. “But—we are still strong together.” 

“I can tell. Who are you searching for?” 

“Well, we aren’t entirely sure. We heard word that the First Order are coming here in search of a girl who has displayed strong Force abilities. The leader of the First Order, Snoke, and his apprentice Kylo Ren, are looking to capture her as a new ally. A new Force-user for them to take and use to their will.” 

Finn’s heart drops in to his stomach. “What do you know about her? How can I help?”

“Well, I expect her Force abilities will be similar to yours. New, and untrained, but very strong.”

“Do we have an approximate location?” Finn’s strategic mind is kicking in, immediately beginning to plan tactical approaches they can take to find this girl; to make sure they get to her before the First Order does. 

“Do you know anything about it, Finn?” Luke asks carefully. 

“No. I’m sorry, I wish I did. That wasn’t my mission when they brought me here, though. It was something else.”

“I wonder if I will be able to sense her,” Luke ponders, almost to himself. Finn watches as he closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and reaches out his hand. He watches in awe; in fascination. This is not how he thought this day was going to go—and he’s extremely glad.

A few minutes of silence later, Luke’s eyes open again and his hand drops. “No. Nothing.” 

“I…,” Finn hesitates, unsure if he can possibly be useful. “Maybe I could…try? I’m not saying I’m better than you, of course, I just…well, maybe it could work, I don’t want to be rude—”

Luke chuckles, patting Finn on the shoulder, reassuring and calming. “Go ahead, Finn! Your confidence is nothing to fear or be ashamed of.” 

“I wouldn’t say confidence,” he murmurs. 

“Well, you’ve got something in there. Hope, confidence, the Force. Call it what you want, but you made it this far. And I know you can go further.” He smiles and nods encouragingly, “go ahead. Reach out.” 

“I’ve never done this before,” 

“All you can do is try, hm? That’s enough.” 

Finn nods. Tentatively, Finn lets his eyelids flutter shut. He listens to the wind whipping around them, the sound of vague voices murmuring behind them in the village. He takes a deep breath. The air is hot, but dry, not sticky. His nose burns with it, but he lets the feeling sink in to his lungs, carry through in to his body, lets the oxygen fill his blood. 

“That’s it, Finn,” Luke’s voice says, “feel your surroundings. Just let it wash over you. Every sensation.” 

Finn listens. He smells. He _feels_. 

Suddenly, his mind’s eye is spanning across the lengths of the desert, over sand dunes and little village homes; passing creatures and old, abandoned ships. There are life forms everywhere, surrounding them, and Finn doesn’t know how he’ll ever find one particular person in all of this—

But then, there she is. A bright white glow amongst the dullness of the other surroundings. It would be impossible for him to miss her. 

She hits him like a huge gust of wind. It breaks him out of his trance, makes his ears buzz, his vision swim. He stumbles backwards, barely manages to steady himself and places his hands on his knees, bending over and gasping for breath.  
“Finn?” Luke’s voice is distant, somehow. 

But Finn saw her. 

He _saw_ her.

“Are you alright?” 

“I saw her,” Finn says instead of answering Luke’s concerned question. 

“You did?” 

“Yes.” Human. Brown hair tied in three buns down the back of her head. Freckled skin, a troubled look in her eyes, and an overwhelming sense of hope. Of strength. Belief that things can be better. He saw her. He really, really _saw_ her. “She’s across the ridge. Just about a mile. In an—old AT-AT, I think? It’s in the sand. On its side.” 

Finn catches his breath, and his ears pop. He can finally hear clearly again. 

Luke is standing above him, a hand on Finn's back, looking at him with wide, shocked eyes. He looks dumfounded. He’s not saying anything. Finn isn’t even sure if he’s breathing. 

“Are you…alright?” Finn asks. 

Silence passes for another moment. He looks away, staring in to nothing. “We came here for one,” breathes Luke, voice small and struck by something Finn can’t explain, “but I think we were meant to find two.”


	2. heaven only knows where you've been

Finn has never been the new kid before.

(It feels less isolating than he would have thought. He doesn’t feel like he sticks out amongst these people, even though he’s never used the Force a day in his life until today.)

But he _has_ been a boy out of place, been thrown in to situations he wasn’t expecting, been taken from his home and thrown from horrible one thing to another horrible thing. 

 

Thanks to Finn sensing her presence, they found the dark haired girl, and she agreed to come with them once she found out the Order were after her. She says she has to come back when it’s all figured out. Her name is Rey. She glows, in Finn’s mind; there’s something about her that draws him in, something that just feels like he’s known her his whole life. 

(He knows that sounds crazy—but it’s the only way he can think of it). 

She’s sitting in the lounge of their ship as they fly away from Jakku. She looks bewildered, and although she puts up a strong front that makes it seem like nothing can touch her, Finn can tell she’s scared. 

He understands. He really, really does. 

And he just wants to help. Maybe they can help each other understand this crazy situation. 

Carefully, he approaches and sits beside her, leaving a metre between them. “Hey,” he says. 

She turns to look at him and tries to smile. “Hi.” 

“I know this is a ridiculous question, given the circumstances, but…are you okay? I know this is all a bit overwhelming. It’s…Luke only found me today and I just…don’t know if it’s all really hit me yet.”

Rey turns her body so she can look at him more easily. “You mean you didn’t know Luke until today?” 

Finn shakes his head. “No. He found me hiding out in the village.” 

“Hiding?” 

“Yeah,” he looks away and runs a hand over his hair. He’s still sticky with all that sweat from the Jakku heat, and there is definitely some sand in places there should never be sand. (Why and how does it get _everywhere_?) “It’s…a long story.” 

Rey looks away for a moment, gaze falling to her lap where she’s picking at the dry skin on her palm. “I wasn’t exactly expecting to end up here today, either.” 

“I know. I’m sorry about that.” 

“I’m told you were the one who found me,” she looks back up at him. Her eyes are dark hazel and have a depth to them Finn can’t quite explain. She looks at him like she understands. “How?” 

“Yeah, uh…that’s kind of a long story, too. Let’s just say the Force.” 

She lets out a big, tired breath and looks up to the ceiling for a moment, shaking her head. “The Force,” she says, disbelief in her voice. “This morning I woke up expecting to do my usual routine for the day, and now here I am, on a ship with Luke Skywalker who I didn’t even know was real, apparently I have the Force in me, or something, and now the First Order are after me because of it?” 

He smiles sympathetically. “I know. It’s crazy, huh?” and Finn realises, not for the first time, that even though they have very different backgrounds, they really are very similar in a lot of ways. “Listen, I want you to know you have a friend. I mean, I’m sure these people are all willing to be our friends, but, uh…you know. I feel like we understand each other. At least a little bit.”

Looking up at him again, Rey’s lips turn at the corners in to a small, tentative smile. Her cheeks are covered in little freckles. There’s sand in her hair. “Yeah,” she says, voice soft. “Yeah, I think we do. You’re the only person here who’s as new to this as I am.” And then, a real smile grows on her lips, and her expression is hesitantly hopeful, elation somewhere behind those guarded eyes. “Friends.” 

Finn smiles. “Friends.” He’s never had a friend before.

“So how did you end up on Jakku?” He asks. The question is innocent, well-intentioned, but the minute he asks, Rey completely shuts down. Her body language was never very open in the first place but now it’s even more closed-off than before. Her muscles go taught, lips in to a thin line, and the air around them grows tense. 

“Hey, it’s…it’s okay, you don’t have to answer,” Finn backtracks, trying to reassure her, to comfort her. It’s awkward, suddenly, and he doesn’t know how to make her feel better. “I’m sorry, it’s a personal question. It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me, Rey.” 

“I, um,” her voice trembles. She clears her throat and scratches at her neck, and then says, without looking at Finn, “I’m going to go and…clean up a bit.” She stands, and then she’s walking away. 

Finn deflates. He slumps back against the back of his seat and frowns. He hadn’t meant to make her uncomfortable. That’s the last thing he wanted. 

He’s never been around people that aren’t First Order soldiers in training or superior officers. He knows perfectly well how to communicate, though—or so he thought. Hejust never wants to hurt anyone. Ever. 

People are complicated. 

 

“Finn, Rey is using the shower at the moment but I have some clean clothes for you both,” Luke smiles at Finn as he walks in to the lounge. “I gave Rey’s hers before she headed in to the refresher.” He’s got a pile of clothing in his arms and he places it down on the table.

“Thank you, Luke,” Finn stands to greet him. “You’ve been so kind to us.” 

Luke reaches out and holds on to Finn’s shoulder. His smile is warm and eyes soft and reassuring. “I know you’ve been through a lot,” he says. “So has Rey. But I want both of you to know that you’re not alone anymore.” 

Finn nods, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. “Thank you. I—thank you.” 

“Of course. Now, once Rey is finished up in the ’fresher, feel free to take a shower and get yourself in to some comfortable clothes. If they don’t fit right, just let me know. We can sort something out.” 

He doesn’t know what to say other than _thank you, thank you, thank you._

Luke nods like he understands, gives Finn’s shoulder a squeeze, and then says, “you and Rey have a lot in common, you know.” 

“I know. It’s strange that we do, but…we do. I…think I might have upset her earlier,” 

“What happened?” 

“I asked her about her life on Jakku, and…she kind of closed up on me.” 

“Ah,” Luke nods. “It’s okay, Finn. I’m sure she’ll begin to open up in time.” 

“Do you think she’ll be angry with me?” 

Luke grins, a little mischief in his gaze. “Who could be angry with you, Finn?” He teases. 

Finn finds himself laughing. “I mean it,” he says, still smiling a little. “I don’t want her to think she can’t talk to me…,” 

“Finn, it’s okay,” Luke reassures, “she’ll be fine. I promise. You’re a good man. She knows that. We _all_ know that.” He gives Finn’s shoulder one last pointed squeeze, and then walks away. 

Finn places a hand atop the pile of clothing. _His_ pile of clothing. He doesn’t care if they don’t fit right—he’s going to wear them. They’re the first real thing that have been his to own; the first clothes he’s ever had that haven’t just been for practicality as a soldier. 

There’s a dressing room that leads in to the shower. It’s where clothing gets stored and washed. There are benches and cupboards full of linens and clothes, a huge sink—Finn assumes the size is for laundry—and a mirror above it. The door at the end of the room leads to the actual ’fresher, where there’s a toilet, shower and sink. 

Honestly, this feels like luxury. 

He can hear the shower running behind the door as he looks in to the mirror. He’s a bit of a state, to be honest. His dark shirt and trousers are now an ashy beige colour, covered in sand and dust. His face shines with the remainders of sweat and oils and there are marks on his skin where he grazed himself while running away. Dry, flaky palms reach out to turn on the faucet, gathering water in them to splash on his face. The coolness feels fresh. He keeps his eyes closed, letting his wet face drip in to the sink, and takes a deep breath. 

 

The door to the refresher opens. Finn opens his eyes and reaches for the towel to dry off his face. 

Rey is there wearing the clothes Luke gave her. Grey trousers taper down her legs and come in at her ankles, with a space to attach a leg holster on her right thigh. Pockets line her legs, along with zips in various places, and her shirt is a simple beige T-shirt, the neckline showing some of her interesting tan lines from the clothes she had on Jakku. Her arms are exposed and just as freckled as her face and shoulders. 

“Hi,” she smiles softly at him, running a towel over her wet hair. 

So, maybe she’s not mad at him. 

Finn finds himself breathless at the sight of her. He doesn’t want to think about why right now. “Hey,” he smiles, “you look clean.” 

She laughs, small but genuine, and carefully hangs her towel up to dry. “Thanks. You don’t.” 

A surprised laugh bubbles out of him. “Gee, thanks.” 

Mischievous, Rey looks over at him with a grin and a twinkle in her eye. She looks…brighter, somehow. Like a weight has been lifted from her shoulders. Like the further they’re getting from Jakku, the lighter her heart is becoming. 

“I didn’t use up all the hot water. Shower’s all yours, Finn,” she says. “You look like you could use it.” 

Finn’s mouth drops open, eyes smiling. He laughs, “hey!” 

She’s grinning at him now, and he can’t handle the way his heart is clenching in his chest. She’s…like no one he’s ever met before, and he’s only known her a few hours. 

“I’ll see you later, yeah?” Finn asks before she can leave the room. Obviously they’ll see each other later—they’re stuck on the same ship in the middle of space—but he just wants her to know that, yeah, he _wants_ to see her later. 

She smiles. “Later, Finn.” 

 

Everyone eats a meal together that night. It’s not fresh food, but it’s a far cry from anything Finn—and, he assumes, Rey—has ever eaten before. In the Order, they had the same meal every day, and taste was not a factor in the preparation; it was merely there for nutritional value. 

Finn sits beside Rey, as per her request, and he can’t help but smile at the way she’s eating literally everything she possibly can. She grabs breads, dried fruit, puts forkfuls of her meal in to her mouth every second. The excitement, the innocence in her thrilled expression, makes Finn’s heart soar. 

Rey catches him looking at one point. He looks away instantly, feeling his cheeks flush with embarrassment, but Rey just giggles and nudges her elbow in to his. “Am I drawing attention to myself?” She asks, covering her mouth as she swallows the last of her mouthful. 

“Not at all,” Finn answers honestly, “it’s just nice to see people enjoying food. Never had that before.” 

She frowns curiously. “Do you have a mysterious past like me, Finn?” Her tone is teasing, but behind it is a genuine question; an inquiry, wondering if they have another thing in common. 

“I guess you could say that, yeah.” 

And he could tell her the truth. He could. But he’s not ready. 

She smiles at him for another moment, biting down on her bottom lip. Something crosses her face; a memory, maybe, and a little embarrassment. “Hey, um, Finn. I’m sorry about earlier. When I got—weird, when you asked about Jakku.” 

“It’s okay,” he says instantly, “I promise, it’s okay.” 

“I just—well, I have a past I’m not quite ready to talk about yet, either. I…hope you can understand?” 

He nods. He wants to say, _God, Rey, I don’t think I’ve ever understood anyone the way I understand you._ “I do,” he says. “I understand.”

“I’ll—tell you when I’m ready.… If I’m ready.” She adds, muttering now as she lowers her head. 

“Hey,” Finn says, “you don’t ever have to tell me if you don’t want to.” 

She looks back up at him, frowning. “You really wouldn’t mind?” 

Finn shakes his head. “No. It’s what friends are for, right?” 

Her lips spread in to a smile, eyes sparkling with something other than mischief this time—maybe hope, maybe gratitude—and Finn notices her glancing down his face and then back up again before she speaks. “I’ll let you in on one little secret,” she whispers, playful, leaning in conspiratorially. She holds his gaze, swallows, and then says, “I’ve never had a friend before.” 

Finn’s heart does that funny clench in his chest again. “Neither have I.” 

* * *

“Can I confess something to you?” Rey whispers to Finn as they gather their bags.

“Of course,” Finn replies quietly, attaching his belt around his waist. 

“My bed,” she’s got that sparkle in her eye again, “it’s too soft for me to sleep on. That sounds so ungrateful, doesn’t it? I slept better on _Jakku_ than I did on that thing.” 

Laughing quietly, Finn hauls his bag on to his shoulder and shakes his head. “Nope. I get it.” 

“My hammock on Jakku was…less than good. But it’s what I’m used to, y’know?” 

Together, they head towards the ship’s entrance, waiting on Luke to open the ramp. “Yeah. I used to sleep on a bed that was more metal than mattress.” 

She smirks. “Sounds like my hammock would have been a step up.” 

“Maybe,” he smiles at her, his gaze lingering even after she’s already looked away. 

“Alright, everyone. We’re just staying for the night, as you know. Tomorrow, we reach the Temple.” Luke says. 

Everyone nods. Finn and Rey are standing in between Amelia and Angie, sisters from Coruscant. They, along with the rest of the older students, have lightsabers hanging from their belts. Younger students are in the middle of everyone.

They’re stopping at a planet where Luke has some allies who are helping them with supplies and intel. Finn and Rey don’t know everything, but they know enough. The First Order haven’t officially started a war yet, but given how they seem to be set on destroying the Jedi, it’s important to be prepared for any scenario. (Especially ones that almost definitely will happen.) 

(Finn shudders at the thought.) 

“You okay?” Finn asks Rey quietly, leaning closer to her as the ramp slowly lowers. 

Rey looks at him. She looks fine, but Finn can sense her nerves. “Yeah,” she nods like she’s trying to convince herself. 

Nervously, Finn smiles. He lets out a breath. “I don’t know if I am.” 

Her brow comes together in to a gentle frown, a crease appearing on her forehead. “It’ll be okay,” she says. 

“I’ve just—never been so far from…,” he can’t say ‘home’. He doesn’t remember his real home. He doesn’t even know if he ever had one. “…where I come from.” 

Something flickers across Rey’s face. “I understand,” her voice is soft. For a long, drawn-out moment, Rey looks at him, eyes flicking between both of his and down to his lips occasionally. She looks hesitant, in a way, and the moment lasts for a long time before he feels something touching his hand. 

He tears his gaze from Rey’s face, and his stomach flips up in to his throat when he sees that Rey is tentatively holding on to the side of his hand. Her hands are calloused and worn, but warm, and Finn can feel her pulse. His mouth is dry all of a sudden. For the first time, it’s not from dehydration. This is something else. 

He’s never been touched with tenderness. 

He looks back up at her to find her smiling nervously. She squeezes his hand. He squeezes back, albeit a little shaky. 

Nothing needs to be said. 

(He doesn’t know if he could say anything right now even if he wanted to.)

* * *

Rey can’t sleep.

The bed is too soft—she doesn’t think she’ll ever get used to that— and the place they’re staying is in the middle of a bustling, loud city where, apparently, none of the residents sleep at night. There are lights outside her small window and her curtains are doing nothing to contain it. 

Rey is used to being alone, and she’s used to being scared. This trip isn’t really fazing her, but the thought of the future is. 

She can sense that Finn is awake in the room next to hers (it’s still a weird feeling, being able to _sense_ things like this; it’s now been a few weeks since the Force awakened in her but, fuck, it’s not something you just adjust to), and she wonders if he’s awake for the same reason. He always understands her; even if he doesn’t _say_ he does, she can tell from the look in his eyes, from the way it feels when they’re in the same room. 

She feels safe with Finn. And that’s a weird feeling, too, having grown up on a planet where no one—absolutely _no one_ —is to be trusted. 

But, here they are. 

And before she knows it, she’s padding down the hallway and knocking tentatively on his door. 

He’s there in a matter of seconds, wearing loose grey trousers and a grey T-shirt. (God, his arms are so strong. Her hand probably wouldn’t fit around his bicep. The T-shirt sleeve barely does.) 

“Hey,” he says quietly. “You okay?” 

“Yeah, um,” Rey can’t help it, she smiles at him, “can’t sleep.” 

“Me neither,” Finn smiles in return. He drops his arm from the door and gestures towards his room, “you wanna come in? We can keep each other company.” 

Rey _beams_. She can’t help it; her smile is automatic when it comes to Finn. Nodding, Rey walks past him and in to his room, sitting on the edge of the bed, bringing up her legs on to the mattress and crossing them in front of her. She leans her chin in her hands and watches as Finn comes over, settling with his back against the headboard, facing her from the side. 

“It’s just all strange, isn’t it?” She says. “All of…this.” 

Finn chuckles. “Yeah. I mean, the room is nice and all, but the refresher is kinda weird. Have you seen that toilet?” he says, playful, a teasing look in his eye. 

Rey laughs. (No one ever made her laugh before Finn.) “You know what I mean,” she reaches out and playfully pushes at his ankle. 

“Yeah, I do.” 

“I’m so used to the quiet of Jakku. It’s…loud here. Bright.” 

“Where I’m from, night to night was different. It’s…some nights were loud, some were quiet. I don’t know how I ever got any sleep.” 

Rey watches him curiously for a moment. The question is on the tip of her tongue; the curiosity, wanting to know about Finn’s past, about where he comes from, why he has the same lost, troubled look in his eyes as Rey does. She can tell by looking at him—here in the middle of the night, especially, with light from three moons and city glow shining on his face, skin glowing amber, eyelashes dancing against his cheeks as he looks down at the bed—that he’s been through a lot. And yet he remains…bright, full of light and joy, safety and honour. 

Rey looks away before he catches her staring. It’s silent, but not awkward; honestly, Rey could sit in silence with Finn for hours and not feel strange. 

“I know you want to ask me,” Finn’s voice says all of a sudden, breaking the silence, somehow making Rey jump a little. 

She looks up at him. “What?”

“I know you want to ask where I come from,” his voice is calm. “I…kind of want to know the same about you.” 

Rey’s ears grow hot. She looks down, fiddling with the hem of her shirt. 

“You don’t have to tell me,” Finn assures, “but…I can tell you about me.” 

Rey doesn’t lift her head, just gazes tentatively at him from under her eyelashes. “You don’t have to. It’s okay.” 

“I want to,” he insists. His eyes are gentle but nervous; there’s a wrinkle between his eyebrows that Rey wishes would go away. He’s scared. 

“Really, Finn, you don’t have to…,” 

“I was a stormtrooper,” he says suddenly, voice quiet and timid but somehow cutting through the room, not startling, but present. He’s looking at her now like he’s expecting her to run away. To shout and call him a monster. 

“A stormtrooper,” Rey keeps her voice calm and level. 

Finn nods. He licks his bottom lip anxiously. “I know that’s—bad. I…hate my past. I was kidnapped as a baby and raised by the First Order to be a soldier,” he looks down. Rey can feel his sadness. “I ran away when they sent me out on my first kill mission. That’s…how I ended up on Jakku. That's partly why I went with Luke. To get away.”

Rey watches him. Silence passes over them, and she can tell that with every passing moment, Finn grows increasingly nervous. “You never knew your family,” she whispers, unable to take her eyes off him. 

He shrugs one shoulder. “I mean, I guess I did, but I…don’t remember them.”

“Me too,” she finds herself blurting, and then immediately tries to patch over what she just admitted as if she can just somehow erase it, “I—I mean—I mean, it’s…,” Rey looks down at her lap and sighs, closing her eyes for a second. It’s overwhelming. Every time she finds out something about Finn, even if it’s something that’s entirely different to her experience, somehow it’s also exactly the same. And the parts Rey doesn’t understand, the parts she can’t relate to—she wants to try to understand anyway. The way he looks at her makes her feel like she can tell him anything, makes her feel safe; being _near_ Finn makes her feel safe, and accepted, and another warm feeling that she can’t quite put her finger on. It’s like she _belongs_ , when Finn is around. And that is terrifying, because she’s spent her entire life making sure no one can get past her walls, that no one can get to her heart; but Finn, but _Finn_ —

“Rey,” Finn’s soft voice breaks her out of her racing thoughts. He shuffles a little closer to her and, when she looks up at him, his expression is sad now instead of scared. His eyes are glassy, three wrinkles gracing his forehead, showing his concern. (He’s so expressive. Rey wishes she could express herself like he can). “I know it’s not that simple, but you _can_ trust me,” he says. “It’s okay if you don’t. But you can.” 

She looks down again, suddenly overwhelmed by his gaze, and screws her eyes shut. There are tears threatening to spill over, and she can’t let them. Won’t let them. 

And then, she feels Finn’s hand gently cover hers where it sits on the bed. His palm hovers just above her skin, touching so gently that he could easily pull away at any second. Without thinking, Rey turns her hand over and grasps at Finn’s, holding tight, not even looking at him; just touching, just connecting. She can feel his pulse under hers, can feel it as though they’re merging together and becoming one, two hearts but one heartbeat, two minds but one soul. 

It must be the Force. Holding hands can’t just…create a feeling like this, Rey thinks. Because right now, she can really, truly, _feel;_ she can feel Finn, can feel herself, can feel everything around her. 

“Finn,” Rey breathes, carefully looking up at him.

There’s a tear falling down Finn’s cheek. Rey reaches up with her free hand, trembling a little, to wipe it away. 

“Rey,” he says, “I…,” his mouth opens and closes a few times, seemingly lost for words. 

“It’s okay,” Rey laughs softly, a little teary, and shakes her head. “I know you were scared to tell me about where you come from,” she whispers, “I can…feel that you still _are_ scared…,”

“It’s not exactly a promising past, is it?” 

“Neither is mine,” she shrugs a shoulder sadly. “I don’t know why my mother and I were on Jakku in the first place, but I know that she died when I was four, and I don’t remember her. Not really. And…since then I’ve been alone.” 

Another tear falls from Finn’s eye, and then another, and he’s looking at her so intensely, so compassionately, that Rey gives up on trying to stop her own tears. “Rey…,”

Taking a deep breath, Rey wipes the droplets from her cheeks, squeezes Finn’s hand. “But I don’t…feel alone anymore,” her voice is a breath, barely there. 

Finn hears her. “Neither do I,” 

Rey can’t help herself; she smiles. The sadness in her chest is being wrapped in a warmth, a comfort; not being replaced or leaving her completely—she doesn’t think that’s even possible—but she feels comforted and, for the first time in her life, like things might be okay.

 

It might not last, but for right now, the feeling is there. 

 

She lets herself be calm with it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all so much for your encouraging feedback on the first chapter. I hope you enjoyed this one too! <3 happy Finnrey Friday <3


	3. birds fly

The temple that Luke takes them to is absolutely stunning. It’s all ivory bricks, plants weaving their way up the walls, windows coloured with stained glass, and it’s surrounded by green and colourful plant life. There are some buildings that have disintegrated slightly over time, but other parts remain intact; they might need a little TLC, but it’s a far cry from the places Finn’s used to seeing. 

He can hear animals around them, sense their life and their movement; can feel the gentle, warm breeze blow against his skin, surrounding him. He can hear Rey’s heartbeat. He can feel the life of the Temple. 

“Years ago this was a place used to train the new generation of Jedi,” Luke says as they enter the main courtroom, huge stone pillars stretching from the floor to the high, beamed ceilings. It’s a big open space with staircases at the end leading left and right. “The main barracks are upstairs. The floor plans I have show another set of bedrooms in one of the buildings that’s now out of action. It was one of the first buildings ever constructed here. For now, take your things in to the living quarters and we’ll do some meditation before we begin anything else. Finn, Rey, can I talk to you for a moment?” 

Finn and Rey look at each other before looking at Luke. (They do that a lot. Look at each other before doing anything, as if for reassurance.) “Sure,” they say at the same time. 

Luke takes them off in to the kitchen area, casually dusting off some of the worktops with his palm as they pass.

“I know this is all very unfamiliar to you both,” Luke says, his eyes soft as he looks at them. “I’m sorry for that. Whatever I can do to make this easier, just say the word.” 

“Thank you,” Rey says. 

“Now, everyone will be required to share rooms because of the lack of space. If you wish, you can share with each other, or with other students, or you can take the beds in the ship if that makes you more comfortable. I’m unsure what you’re familiar with.” 

Finn glances at Rey. “I’m just grateful for a place to sleep,” he shrugs with a smile. 

Luke smiles at him in return. “I want you to know there’s no pressure to become students, to join the academy, to do anything you don’t want to. For now, my priority is making sure you’re both safe.” 

“From the First Order?” Rey asks, crossing her arms nervously. 

Luke nods. “Yes. And…life in general, I suppose. The universe hasn’t been too kind to either of you, has it?” 

Finn looks down, bashful, shuffling his foot across the floor. Neither of them say anything. 

Luke reaches out and places a hand on Finn’s arm, then his metal one on Rey’s. “Whatever you need, we are here for you. I know there’s a lot to think about.” 

Again, Finn looks at Rey, who is already staring at him with wide eyes. She’s so tough—you can see it in the way she stands, the way she holds herself—but Finn can see the vulnerability there. “Can we, uh, talk…just the two of us?” Finn asks, looking back to Luke who nods and squeezes their arms before letting go. 

“Of course. Please, feel free to look around and get yourselves acquainted with the place. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” He grins, teasing, and leaves them in the kitchen. 

It’s full of disused technology, things that look just like the items that are still used today. Touchscreens, broken holo transmitters, a few old service droids in the corner. 

Rey is looking around like a child in a toy store. 

“There’s so much here I could fix,” she says, almost to herself. 

“Yeah? You good at fixing stuff?” 

She looks at him and smiles. “Uh…yeah. Call it the Jakku Lifestyle, I guess.” 

He smiles at her, soft and explorative. “Think you could show me? I’ve always been interested in stuff like that.” 

“Of course. I’m hoping it might help Luke out a little to fix some of this stuff. It’s the least I can do.” 

“Yeah,” Finn sighs, scrubbing at the back of his neck with his palm. “It’s all overwhelming, isn’t it?” 

“Yeah,” Rey nods, running her fingers over one of the location tracking transmitters. “This is a device I heard about that the Jedi used in the council. I didn’t think it was a real thing because…I didn’t think the Jedi were real.” 

“I was always told they were real, but that they were evil,” he thinks back to his childhood memories, avoiding the ones that make him shudder and want to cry, and remembers the Officers preaching about how the Empire and the Order were superior and the Jedi were scum…, “or something like that.” 

“Did you ever believe them?” 

Finn thinks about that for a second. “No,” he answers honestly. “I always…tried not to believe anything they told me. Didn’t…always work. I’m sure there are a lot of things I think I know that were actually twisted by their agenda.” 

“You’re smarter than you think, Finn. But I get what you mean,” Rey smiles sadly. “So, how are you doing with all…this?” She gestures around them, casual and ironic, as though this room itself represents everything they’re dealing with. 

Finn takes a deep breath. He looks around and nods. “I’m okay,” he says. “Anything in my future is better than where I’ve been.”

Rey looks at him as though he’s just said something profound and never-before-heard. Her eyes are wide as she nods tentatively, and she bites her lip, glancing away for a moment. “Yeah,” she says, voice almost a whisper. “Yeah. Me too.” 

“So, ship or barracks for choice of too-soft mattress tonight?” 

She laughs. It’s gorgeous. “I’m gonna have to go with the ship for now. I’m used to it now. If it’s an option to stay there, I’m staying there.” 

Finn grins. “I was thinking the same thing.” 

They’ve been sharing a room on the ship ever since the night they sat up and bared their souls to each other in Finn’s room. It’s comforting to hear Rey breathing beside him. Even when he can’t sleep, he knows he’s not alone; and not in the way it was when he was with the Order, when he felt as though someone was always watching him, that he never had a moment to himself. His bunkmates were spiteful and violent and, even when there were no guards watching them, Finn never felt comfortable. 

This, with Rey, is different. She’s all hard edges but soft soul, something Finn has never encountered before. 

* * *

A week passes, and things are running pretty smoothly at the Temple now. Most things that needed fixing have been fixed, the oldest intact rooms have been dusted and cleaned, and all the technology needed is up and running.

It’s a sunny day today, but there’s a little chill to the air as Rey shows Finn how to fix the communication beacons that Luke needs as soon as possible. 

“It’s just in the way you move your tool, see?” 

Finn leans over her shoulder, watching intently. “Oh yeah. I see. Let me try.” He picks up his own device and uses his wrench to gently and decisively turn the screw in to its place. The beacon flickers to life in his hands, and Rey smiles, watching a grin grow on his face.

“See? You’re a natural.” 

“Not entirely. They kinda taught me some stuff before, I guess.” 

Rey twists the device in her hands, observing it from all angles. “I’ve only ever seen these from a distance.” 

“Then how did you know how to fix them?”

She shrugs. “It’s a similar mechanism to some things I’ve worked on before.” 

Finn’s looking at her in that way he does sometimes, where his eyes smile and sparkle at her. 

“What?” She asks, grinning. 

“Nothing. You’re just…really clever.” 

Rey grins and nods towards the device in Finn’s hands, now transmitting healthily as it should. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

They’re interrupted by footsteps approaching. They know it’s Luke before turning to see, but when they do turn around he’s standing there in his black Jedi outfit with a small smile on his face. 

Finn and Rey stand up, wiping dust off their trousers. 

“Two communication devices to join the others,” Rey smiles as they hold up the fixed pieces. 

“That’s great, thank you,” Luke says, “but that’s not what I came over here for. I was wondering if you have a moment to chat?” 

Rey and Finn glance at each other. Finn asks, “both of us?” 

Luke nods once, watching as Finn and Rey look to each other and wordlessly communicate that their answer is _yes, we have a moment._

Luke takes them in to one of the common rooms. They sit down and Luke smiles, crossing his hands in his lap.

“So, we’ll skip all the formalities for now,” Luke says. “I suppose I just wanted to officially ask the two of you if you’d like to join my students and become Jedi in training.” For a moment, Finn and Rey look at each other, and Finn’s eyes are curious but not scared. Luke continues before they can say anything, though. “I know it’s a lot to ask,” he says, “and I want you to know that it’s not a contract. If you say yes, no one is going to hold you to it if you change your mind. I know it’s all very new and might seem a bit intimidating, but you’ve done so well in the time we’ve known each other, and I really think you’d make great additions to our team.” 

Rey can’t help but smile a little. A _team._

Finn’s expression is similar, although he seems slightly hesitant, and Rey can understand why. He’s been in teams before that haven’t exactly worked out for him. This is a place where the two of them differ: Rey has always been alone and Finn has always been with other people. But where their paths meet is that both of them, no matter the literal circumstances, have always been truly, deeply alone. 

“We can even start it on a trial period, if you like. Whatever you need, I’ll help you with.” Luke adds, and Finn and Rey turn back to look at him. “I see you both rely on each other a lot. That’s good. Would you like me to give you a moment?” 

“No,” 

“No,” 

Finn and Rey speak at the same time, giggling a little when they realise the thought they subconsciously shared. Rey nods at Finn for him to talk first.

“No, I mean, uh…I’m happy with…all this. I want to learn about the Force, about what it all means. Rey?” 

She nods. “Me, too.” 

Luke grins, clapping his hands together, “fantastic! I’m so pleased to have you. Great things are ahead. It’s official,” he reaches across with his flesh hand, holding it out for Finn to shake. Rey watches and smiles when Luke reaches towards her, and she goes to shake it in return. As their hands get close, the lights in the room begin to flicker. 

Thinking nothing of it, Rey shakes Luke’s hand with a smile—a smile that soon fades as the world around suddenly her goes dark, throwing her backwards; the air going in to her lungs is no longer the air of a Jedi temple, it’s the air of Jakku, hot and suffocating; her eyes flutter shut and she’s plunged in to a world she know cannot be reality, it must be some kind of dream or vision, but she knows she could reach out and touch the figure in front of her and feel it under her hands. 

She does. Reaches out and holds the person’s hands, her own trembling. 

Distantly, Rey feels someone else’s presence.

Her mother’s face turns to smile down at her. 

Dark hair, a kind smile, and sad eyes. A clear picture from a memory locked away. 

“Mother?” 

“Rey,” the figure whispers, and the sun behind her blinds Rey, turning her mother’s face in to merely a dark shadow as it leans down towards her, hands coming up to cup Rey’s cheeks. Her fingertips are calloused and dry. 

“Mother, what’s wrong?” Rey feels hot tears fall down her face before her mum wipes them away with shaking thumbs. 

“Rey,” she says again, her face getting blurry, and Rey feels how cold her hands are, suddenly sees how her breath is coming in short gasps, struggling for air. She falls to the floor and suddenly Rey is hovering above her, weeping, trying to keep her alive. 

“Mother! No!” Cries Rey, realising for the first time that her voice is the voice of a child; high pitched and desperate, hands small and narrow, watching her mum die in front of her.

“I’m sorry,” her mum whispers, weedy and barely there, before she draws in one last breath, head falling back against the sand. 

Someone appears beside them. Standing, arms hanging helplessly by their sides, a hood covering their face. 

Rey looks up, squinting, wiping tears off her cheeks, getting ready to fight. 

Only there’s no staff on her back, no weapons in her clothing. Her hair suddenly comes out of its three-bun style and begins to whip around her face in a breeze, sticking to her cheeks where there are tears still falling. 

The figure is familiar but unrecognisable with the sun behind them, dark hood shadowing their face.

That is until they let out a desperate, choked cry, violently pulling back their hood and falling to their knees beside Rey’s mother’s body. 

His hair is brown, short, one hand donning a glove, the other reaching up to cup her mother’s face. 

It’s Luke. 

It’s Luke, but not as Rey knows him. 

“Mara,” he cries, “Mara, no! Mara…” And then he looks up at Rey, anguish all over his face, cheeks soaked with tears. Confusion flickers over his face. “Rey?” He asks, and his voice is young, light. “Rey? What are you—?” 

He doesn’t finish his sentence as they’re thrown in to another scene, the floor flipping underneath them until they’re standing on a sandy ceiling, forced to fall to the grassy terrain beneath them. The sky clears in to a dark abyss with planets and stars glistening, and Rey’s heart is racing, terror and confusion in her veins. 

“Luke? What’s going on?” She says to him. He's older now. As Rey knows him. 

He ignores her as if she’s not even there. He’s staring at something and Rey follows his line of sight to see he’s staring at a figure across the pathway. A woman, wearing a hood, dark clothing, and a large bag on her back. She’s holding her stomach, rubbing over it comfortingly, and talking to it under her breath. 

It’s…no. It can’t be. 

It’s Rey’s mother. 

“Mara,” Luke says from beside her, but Rey’s mother—Mara—doesn’t respond. They’re just here to watch the scene, not be a part of it; it’s a piece of the past, a vision of events that have already happened. 

They somehow follow Mara as she runs towards the ship docking bay. She’s constantly looking behind and around her, hoping no one sees her. 

“It’s okay,” she whispers to her stomach, “it’s okay. Mother’s got you. I’ll keep you safe—no matter what. Your father will understand.” 

She’s pregnant. 

With Rey.

She’s talking to her baby. 

_To Rey._

And then, almost to herself, looking behind her one last time, “I’m sorry, Luke.” 

She climbs in to an X-Wing, and flies away in to the night. 

Flashes of visions follow; fleeting moments of a pregnant Mara trying to make it through the galaxy to find somewhere safe. Letters she wrote to Luke but never sent—explaining why she left, that she saw the future in a dream, had to protect their daughter from it, had to take her far away where no one would ever discover her power. She wrote that one day the two of them would return to Luke, that the plan was never to stay away forever, that once the future had come to pass, she would find a way back home. 

Rey sees Luke in despair, kneeling at his bedside, begging the galaxy to bring Mara back home. The love of his life was gone, left in the middle of the night, and he never knew why. He was betrayed and heartbroken. 

Briefly, Rey’s memories are present. Memories of seeing her mother die, watching as mercenaries of Unkar Plutt dragged away her body. Spending her entire life after that day alone, scared and hungry.

* * *

And suddenly, it’s all clear.

Suddenly the past, the truth, the things Luke and Rey knew but didn’t want to remember, and the things they never knew in the first place, are clear as day. 

Rey is gasping for air as they’re flung in to an empty, barren wasteland where the remains of what looks like an old temple surround them on the ash-covered ground. Rey can smell the smoke in the air, can feel the heat of a few remaining flames. 

Luke is opposite her, panting for air, just staring ahead at the nothingness, the empty space that used to be somewhere. Somewhere significant. (Rey just can’t put her finger on _why_.) 

“Rey,” Luke says. “Mara…,”

“Luke?” 

Except, no. 

He’s not just _Luke_ , is he? He’s not _just_ Luke. 

He’s her father. 

 

Rey looks at him. He looks back. 

 

A huge gust of wind takes over them and suddenly they’re back in that room in the new Temple, Finn sitting beside her, and her hand still holding on to Luke’s. 

On instinct, she pulls away, gasping for breath. 

“Rey?” Finn’s voice is soft beside her, but it still makes her jump. 

“Rey,” another voice says—Luke, of course—gentle and scared and a little broken. 

She looks up and sees the eyes of the man from the visions. It’s Luke. It’s her father. 

“Luke,” she whispers, a tear rolling down her cheek. 

He didn’t even know she existed. He didn’t know he had a daughter, let alone the fact she was stranded and alone on a hell planet.

Rey spent her whole life thinking her father didn’t want her enough to come back for her. 

Now she knows that’s not true. The pain in Luke’s eyes, the despair in every one of those memories, shows it’s the furthest thing from the truth. 

And maybe she should be a little hurt that he didn’t know about her.

But most, if not all, of the hurt comes from the heartache she feels from him; how it matches hers in such a strange and broken way. 

“Oh my Gods,” Rey sobs, and she falls forward, throwing herself in to Luke’s arms, surprising herself with the act of sudden affection. 

Luke holds her, gently cradles the back of her head, rocks her back and forth as she weeps and weeps in to his shoulder. 

She holds on to him so tightly, saying “I’m so sorry—Luke— _Dad_ —everything you’ve gone through—”

“ _I’m_ sorry,” Luke says, “you needed me and I wasn’t there…,”

Rey shakes her head. “No. You didn’t know. You—you had no idea. You didn’t even—ever know why she left you. She took me away and never told you…,” Rey cries, tears soaking Luke’s clothes. 

Luke just cradles her like a newborn baby; holding his daughter for the first time, weeping softly over her shoulder. 

“I’m sorry,” Luke whispers. “I’m sorry, Rey. I would have been there if I knew.” 

“I know,” Rey pulls away a little so she can look at him. She shakes her head. “I know, dad.” 

A tear falls down Luke’s cheek. Rey reaches out to wipe it away. 

“Rey, your mother…I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry you had to—watch her…watch her die. You were so young. I’m—I’m so sorry.” 

Rey shakes her head. “I’m sorry she left you. I would’ve stayed, if I had the choice.” 

“I’m sorry, Rey.” 

“It’s okay,” she says, “it’s okay.” 

“It’s not.” 

She tries for a little smile as more tears tumble down her skin. “It’s okay now.” 

* * *

“Hey,” Finn says as he steps in to the common room where Rey sits beside the window. It’s the middle of the night.

She turns to him. “Hey, you.” 

“Couldn’t sleep either. I just…wanted to see how you were doing.” 

Smiling softly, Rey brushes some hair from her face and pats the seat beside her, inviting him to sit. He does. “I’m okay. Tired.”

“It’s been a big day,” Finn says, “that’s understandable.” 

“Makes no sense that I’m this tired but can’t sleep.” 

“You’ve got a lot on your mind.” 

She looks down and nods softly. “Yeah. I do.” 

A moment of silence passes over them. “You know,” Finn looks out over the stars in the inky black sky above them, “when I was young, I used to get glimpses at the night sky. Not often. Maybe once a year, if that. But when I did—it was like magic.” 

“I know what you mean. I couldn’t go outside at night on Jakku—it was too dangerous. But sometimes I saw it, just briefly. I would wonder about all the lives on all those planets. Wonder if I’d—” Rey takes a deep, shaky breath. “—If I’d ever see anywhere else. Anywhere other than Jakku.” 

Finn nods, understanding. They sit there for a few quiet minutes. Rey shifts, bringing her knees up to her chest. She rests her chin between her knees, and Finn moves so one of his legs is crossed over the other, casual and relaxed. 

The weight of the day’s events comes over her again, and she sighs, closing her eyes for just a moment. Images flash before her eyes of memories—things she remembers but wants to forget, but also things that she didn’t even know she knew. 

It’s a lot. It’s sadness, but also relief. She’s found her father, she knows what truly happened, and that in itself feels like a huge burden has been taken off her shoulders. But then there’s the sadness of what happened, the weight of feeling Luke’s heartache as well as her own. 

And then, there’s fear. Fear of the future. She knows her father now, but doesn’t truly _know_ him. Not like she knew her mother. Until today, memories of her mother were scarce, almost non-existent, but she always had the memory of the love her mother had for her. The relationship they had, built on trust; she may not have remembered her mother, but she could never forget the warmth of a mother’s love.

“My mother used to tell me stories,” Rey admits in to the darkness. Sitting here, just her, Finn, and the stars above, she feels as though they could be the only two people in the galaxy. “I thought they were made up,” she laughs a little, soft and sad. “Now I know they were real.” 

Finn is looking at her. Rey knows if she looks back, she’ll cry. 

“What stories did she tell you?” He asks. His voice is measured, but kind. 

“She told me about Luke. About their adventures. I just…didn’t know it was about _him_. She told me tales about a teacher with special powers, who went around the galaxy saving children in need. I…never thought one of those children might be me.”

“Well, I guess now you get to be a part of your own adventure story.” 

Slowly, Rey turns to him, a soft, sad smile on her face. “I guess so.” And then, smile widening, she playfully nudges Finn’s arm with her elbow. “We both do.” 

“Yeah, I guess we do. And we’re not in this alone, y’know?” 

Rey smiles again. “No, we’re not.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hola mi gente, sorry for the lack of updates! life hits hard sometimes, ya know?   
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! <3

**Author's Note:**

> I'm real proud of this tbh, this story excites me!   
> I hope you enjoyed and are looking forward to more. Comments and kudos bring me life! <3


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